Arbitrary Fantasy Talk Show
by Cartoonist-in-theory
Summary: A 'talk show' mainly about FFVII. a collaboration between me and The Learner, full summery inside.rated T because we can.


**This shall be a talk show regarding all things Final Fantasy VII, with the occasional guest star upon your request! I, Cartoonist-in-Theory and I The Learner will be working with all of your favorite characters! And now for the disclaimer, Learner, take it away:**

**The Learner: Both Cartoonist-in-Theory and I confirm that we neither own nor claim ownership to any content or characters (except us).**

(opens with obnoxious theme music, the camera pans out to show a large set with two people sitting and waving eagerly)

Cartoonist-in-theory: Hello, and welcome to Arbitrary Fantasy! I am Cartoonist-in-Theory but you can call me Klepto! And this is my co-host The Learner!

The Learner: Thanks Klepto, but you can call me TL. Today's episode will cover many important issues including: the length of Sephiroth's hair-

Klepto: the shininess of Cloud's eyes!-

TL: and how many squats Zack can do in a second-

Klepto: speaking of Zack… this is our beautiful camera man Zack Fair!

Zack: *stands in front of camera* Hey guys! What's up!-

TL: That's enough of that.

Zack: *get's back behind camera*

TL: Today we will have a special Guest, I know right, first episode too!

Klepto: We're so special! ... So who's our guest?

TL: Marlene Wallace! Who will be appearing later on.

Klepto: Awww- OK right now, Sehpy's hair. We have determined that it is about 4 feet long. However we can't ask him BECAUSE HE ISN'T HERE!

TL: Well, where the heck is he?

Klepto: I don't know. I must have left like 15 messages saying that he had to be here at 9 o'clock!

And where is he now?

Zack: Not here.

Klepto: Thank you Zack. That's right NOT HERE! Sephy, if you're watching, I'm hurt!-

TL: Hurt we are. But on a lighter note, if you tied each and every strand of hair on Sephiroth's head together you could make it to the moon and back at least three times!

Zack: Trippy.

Klepto: …..Ahem, well now a word from our sponsors.

(Cuts to Cloud standing next to Vincent and Tifa, smiling and holding papers)

Cloud: Arbitrary Fantasy is brought to you by Sponsors 'R' Us and Chocobo Hair.

Vincent: Yes, Sponsors 'R' Us, providing you with random sponsors for thirty years and counting.

Tifa: And Chocobo Hair if it's not Chocobo, it's not real hair.

(Cuts back to the main stage showing Klepto whispering to someone off stage, and TL combing his hair)

Klepto: Yes my hair is real… no it-

Cloud(off stage): You're back on!

Klepto: *blushes* Oh…

TL: Right and now! Marlene Wallace *gestures to stage left, and Marlene walks in*

Klepto: Awwwwwww! You are so cute!

TL: Hi Marlene, how've you been since Advent Children?

Marlene: Very good thank you! Klepto.

Klepto: Hi, honey! Ok, so, since this is our first show and we don't have any viewer questions, let's play a game!

TL: This was my idea.

Klepto: Whatever. So a guessing game… actually, if this is a bust it was TL's idea.

Marlene you are going to be guessing, ok?

Marlene: Sounds fun! What's the question?

TL: How many squats do you think Zack can do in one second?

Marlene: Ooh… that's tough. Ummm…five…?

Zack: Aw c'mon was that a question?

Marlene: I-I mean five. I think he can do five squats in one second!

TL: Aw so sorry its only 1.8 per second, but as a consolation prize you do get to help us close out the show.

Marlene: Ok 3

Zack: …1.8 hmmm, seems like more…

Klepto: Oh well. That's it for now folks! See you next time and don't forget to send us your questions! You can ask us literally anything, and we will answer!

TL: Until next time don't forget to use Chocobo Hair, ridiculous amounts of it!

Marlene: Buy Final Fantasy VII! 3

Klepto: And remember don't think before you talk!

Klepto/TL/Marlene/Zack: Bye!

(annoying theme music plays as it fades to black)

**Hey that was fun! Sorry it was so short but this was the first show and there will be more. I don't know how good that was, but I promise it will get better! Tell us what you think and ask whatever you want! Really, Whatever you want and we will answer to the best of my abilities ( which are pretty good )**

**Thank you. We will update as soon as we get enough questions to make it interesting. Bye-Bye! ^-^**


End file.
